(via chronicallyvegan)
(via breakfast-with-satan)
I wish there were necklaces given to us at birth that were half of a unique shape and your soulmate wore the other half and they got warmer the closer together you were and colder the further away you were so you could go on this journey when you’re ready to find your other half so that you could be spared all the pain and heartbreak of being played with by those who don’t take dating as seriously as you do
(via breakfast-with-satan)
What in all the fucks?!
Reasons why that pet my hair shit and all that isn’t cute. I didn’t know these places existed until the 50s tho, jeez. Fucking sick. And that baby is just a beautiful child that’s so terrible
- Why you can’t pet my hair
- Why you aren’t bringing me in to shit
- Why the rhetoric of curating and introducing grown as people is iffy as FUCK
- Please note 1950 as a date of continuance. They were doing this while my mom was ALIVE. And while civil rights was started.
White history.
1950. Just before my dad was born. When my grandparents were in their 20s/30s. But y’all wanna talk about ancestors like there aren’t living breathing racists walking around. Racism is shit you learned from your fucking grandparents and parents and uncles and shit. That shit didn’t fall out of the sky. That shit isn’t encoded in your DNA. Learned behavior. Just like how you learned to walk.
Some of your grandparents probably went to a “zoo” like this. brb vomiting.
the reason I have trust issues is because they changed the actor who played Marnie in Halloweentown and thought I wouldn’t notice
(via breakfast-with-satan)
(via breakfast-with-satan)
(via happy-herbivore)
(via breakfast-with-satan)
when i’m married my partner and i will have:
- morning sex
- afternoon sex
- dinner sex
- after meal sex
- i made pancakes sex
- good morning sex
- they kids are at school sex
- shower sex
- bored sex
- make up sex
- break up sex
- obama won sex
- romney lost sex
- monday sex
- tuesday sex
- wednesday sex
- thursday sex
- friday sex
- saturday sex
- monday sex
- there is nothing on tv sex
- i love you sex
(via breakfast-with-satan)




